Post by Gary McCallister on Apr 18, 2012 15:15:44 GMT -5
I decided to set up a second thread that we could use to share samples of writing to ask for feed back etc. I was going to do this and then decided it would cause confusion on our new site. However, then T. Lynn and Sachiko both wanted to know more about some of the ghost stories I am working on. So here is a sample page where we can share things.
Here are the words to Abinadi. I have shared them with a few others because I recognize that I may have gotten a little carried away (risque?). I would be glad to hear your opinions and suggestions, and I will not be offended by honesty.
ABINADI
One eye of gold and one of amber
Watched Abinadi
And in the dark you could almost hear
His lovers longing sigh
Abinadi spoke, though no one was there
He said “I am of so tired.
I’ve cried repentance, words on words
And denied my own desires”.
“You must be weary from all your care“,
His lover whispered there.
“I’ve watched you lovingly from afar
And dreamed of our affair.”
Abinadi turned and asked
“Who’s there beneath the smoke?”
“I am fire,” was her murmured reply
“And this my only cloak.”
“Ah“, cried he, “this cannot be,
For I must fight alone
Against wicked and evil men.
My sins I must atone.
“I admire your integrity.”
Fire sweetly replied.
“I love your courage and your faith.
I love your passion and your pride.”
And so beguiled by words on words
Enticed by warmth and light
Abinadi embraced his love
With blazing appetite.
And deep into her fiery heart
She took Abinadi
And in the dark you could hear
The lovers gentle sighs
One eye of gold and one of amber
Watched Abinadi
Watched his courage. Heard his words.
Saw the glory in his eye.
Then she took the dust that was Abinidi
And wove it for a cloak.
Passion, courage, faith and pride
Enveloped her like smoke
Many long for faith and love,
And in the darkness light.
But fire sits in the sun and sighs
She lost her lover in the night.
Born on the bloody battlefield
In the dark of darkest night.
Another picked up Abinadis’ sword
And carried on the fight
Here are the words to Abinadi. I have shared them with a few others because I recognize that I may have gotten a little carried away (risque?). I would be glad to hear your opinions and suggestions, and I will not be offended by honesty.
ABINADI
One eye of gold and one of amber
Watched Abinadi
And in the dark you could almost hear
His lovers longing sigh
Abinadi spoke, though no one was there
He said “I am of so tired.
I’ve cried repentance, words on words
And denied my own desires”.
“You must be weary from all your care“,
His lover whispered there.
“I’ve watched you lovingly from afar
And dreamed of our affair.”
Abinadi turned and asked
“Who’s there beneath the smoke?”
“I am fire,” was her murmured reply
“And this my only cloak.”
“Ah“, cried he, “this cannot be,
For I must fight alone
Against wicked and evil men.
My sins I must atone.
“I admire your integrity.”
Fire sweetly replied.
“I love your courage and your faith.
I love your passion and your pride.”
And so beguiled by words on words
Enticed by warmth and light
Abinadi embraced his love
With blazing appetite.
And deep into her fiery heart
She took Abinadi
And in the dark you could hear
The lovers gentle sighs
One eye of gold and one of amber
Watched Abinadi
Watched his courage. Heard his words.
Saw the glory in his eye.
Then she took the dust that was Abinidi
And wove it for a cloak.
Passion, courage, faith and pride
Enveloped her like smoke
Many long for faith and love,
And in the darkness light.
But fire sits in the sun and sighs
She lost her lover in the night.
Born on the bloody battlefield
In the dark of darkest night.
Another picked up Abinadis’ sword
And carried on the fight